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June 26, 2010 Y 4:19 PM

I read Shahliza's post, and i can't help but to feel sad about it.
Death, that is something we can't avoid.
Something so real, and yet so far away.
I am sorry for your lose Shahliza.
Let me just share something with you readers.

I lost few very important people in my life, but i know that i still have to carry on.
I lost my sister when I was primary two, and she is the sister that i really looked forward to know.
If she is still alive, I bet she'll bring me to the movies, and we'll go gaga over TWILIGHT instead of Harry Potter, like we used to. & maybe she'll like Fauziah Latiff? Or Faisal Tahir, and maybe, she'll get the chance to interview them? And I bet she'll comment on Rosyam Noor, and Aaron Aziz acting! She'll definitely bring me to karaoke and we'll sing all the dangdut's song! She'll tell me that she love me. She'll definitely bring me to eat out all the time, and tag me along for her wild excursions with her collegues! Like Pulau Tioman and Batam. SHe'll buy more magazines and she'll comment on their clothes xD &she'll ask, "Kenapa Ziana Zain gini?"because she really adore her and Anuar Zain! Maybe she'll cook for me again, and then decide to eat out instaed. -.- Maybe she'll teach me how to paint properly, and she'll teach me the basic of designing clothes? Maybe, she'll still buy me roti prata or yong taufu, like she always do. Maybe she'll wake up in the morning, knock on my door and say "Adik, dah bangun?"and I'll reply "Dah, kakak bawak girl-girl keluar please?" Maybe she'll still ask me to ngaji before sleeping and force me to attend madrasah? Maybe, she'll ask me to model for her magazine like how it used to be? Maybe she'll bring me along for some concerts or some trip to wonderful places. Maybe, she'll make me happy?
IF SHE IS STILL ALIVE. She'll say "Adik, I am proud of you."

Then I lost my Father/Grandfather. Same la, he is still a father to me :)
I lost him when I'm primary 3.
If he is still alive, he'll never let me go astray and I can't just go out anyhow or anytime. He'll bring me out for dinner, and he'll tell 'funny'jokes. He'll bring me and Mak/Grandmother for holiday again. Maybe he'll tell me to study harder. He'll make me clean the house before he returned home. He'll protect me, because I know he loves me very much, if not, I would be taken care by Atok Abu instead. He'll stay late at night to watch soccer. & I'll insist on watching cartoon, and he always give in and let me watch. He'll make the whole family eat dinner every night together. He'll make sure that the stove is always dirty(selalu berasp; faham2 la). He'll walk with his big tummy, and everytime he returned home, I'll run to him and hug him. "Bapak dah balik!" &He'll hug me tight and kiss my forehead.
IF HE IS STILL ALIVE. He'll say "Gal, jadi orang yang baik. Bapak sayang gal!"

It is sad, because I have lost them.
But I decide to keep those alive close at heart, and I won't want to lose another.

June 25, 2010 Y 8:11 PM

* never thought that you go, but you did*
missing 27.09.2009 very much now, and i am not going to let all of it go*

okay, now awesomeee.
Monday came and go like that, and without realising, it is already FRIDAY :)
The week was well spent i hope, with friends and all that crap things I did :D
I remembered that Monday's F&N lesson was postponed. :D

And I spent my time doing some work, i think, i did POA in library.
And come evening, i went to the SC farewell dinner held in school.
it was awesome, cos i feel honoured? :)

and tuesday, i wish i can rewind time back -.-
i wanted to do some studying, when i ended up at bacen house, lepaking till night :D
and because i miss KAK FIZA extremely! :))

and i watched CSI, hoping something good will happen to my hubby Jonathan Togo :(

and wednesday, i spent quality time with the four babes :)
we went to T3, for Rabiah's sake.
and we went to causeway point for some bubletea, before catching up with bacen bf :)
and then we headed home, laughing at all the things around us, and spending time together.
we terserempak with someone unexpected and have a holy great time chasing them :)
Kelakar habes :)
haha, watched GLEE and 90210 :)

Thursday, we went for a run at canberra park.
and i told her about the importance of protein and carbo in our diet :D
dah blh jadik budak F&N yang sangat baek ! :D
tehn headed for F&N lesson. and i didnt have the apron.
well, bcos of some vry cool reason, i think my apron spoilt. :P

we baked cupcakes?! haha, and had a great time going home.
drop dead diva was funny.
slept at 1am, doing f&n laa :P

then today rained heavilyyyy..
spent time with amalina, and we laughed like some stupid cows and bulls ? :)
cos she tried speaking indon and pilipino?
tk emnjadik babe-.-

good day, hella fun :)

June 22, 2010 Y 6:33 PM

selama ini dunia kita berbeza, kau dan aku tiada kata sepakat.
kau dan aku berbeza.
aku ada dunia ku sendiri, dan kau di sana bersama diri mu.

we are not the same. never will be.

i think its time to let it all go, our feelings.
i know you're waiting for my call, so am i.
and listen up, i regret having such PTS in my life.

:) losers.
go on and complain. i don't care.
im getting out of control now.
i want to be free, like angels.

i think you should know that i am insane.
i dont have legs to stand after your death,
after you left, i have no arms to lean on.
you left me alone, trying to hold on to myself.
dah hampir 5 yrs berlalu, u left me alone.

tkper. after one death to another.
dah taknk lagy.
you! september 2002,
then you!
November 2003!
then youuuu!! the one i gave my whole life to!
June 2006!
Then you!
September 2009!
Then youuuu!! the one i laugh with!
April 2010!

thanks for leaving
god bless you all :D

Y 6:20 PM

bad bad day.
bestf is in bad mood now. okay v. scared.
syakirah coming back home soon :)
awesome thing :) update when bestfrnd tk mrh2 laa gini mcm.
argh, i want sleep!

been having sleepless nights, trying to sleep is hard work.
i don't adore sleeping anymore.
i think i rather stay awake and feel weird about things around me.
i think i am insane.
have you ever tried so hard to be perfect, knowing that person will never appreciate you at all?
holy shit, i am beginning to feel useless.

wait a minute, selama ni dunia kita memang berbeza, di mana kau dan aku berada, bagai langit dan bumi.

i wish they were my real parents :)

June 20, 2010 Y 7:41 PM

Okay, on wednesday, i went to watch prince of persia,
i know, like wah, baru nk tengok?
cos wan watch karate kid, and the house is full baby! :P
then, after watching with LOVE SOFIA!
we went to singapore River...
and jalan2 lorh. samapi clark quay babe!
It was very tiringgg, cos kite jalan and jalan.
and yeah, sofia saw pros there too :(
owg maseh blm sedar, dunia nk kiamat babe.

then the next day hang out at bacen house , i don't know what we do. ohh
we went to hospital for check up. i mean sufiyah laa.
and we makan there and all :D gerek babe :D
Emilia, Diyanah and Fira pun dtg jugak pat umah bacen.
then aku balek tengok

It's good baby! and dah abes pun laa.

on friday, dad did me teh bed :)
and its stupid cos he dont know how to fix:)
mom went to work ,and left us in the house doing the rest of cleaning up!!
BAGOS, cos dad ade off. like so random lorhh.
then went out with Azam and Sofia! :)
kita gy marina square. and singapore river. and many more.

OKAY, awesome day.

YESTERDAY, lepak pat rumah nyssa bacen, tengok Evolusi KL Drift 2?

tehn watch hindustan lorh, got salman khan and amitha bachan :))

VIce versa lacst episode tonight :(

GOOD DAY< i want to do F&N evaluation -.-

Y 7:31 PM

Have so many things to say, but we'll keep it short okay?
tomorrow, F&N evaluation due, and guess what? i have not touch it at all!
SO yeah, thank god i called mrs jenny ng today!
Kalaw tak, mampos babe -.-

and tmr is SC camp, and yeah I am so damn excited man :)
and maybe i am going to sleep over or something?

ouh, and today was weird.
i set my alarm at 7.30am for some reason, and i snooze it off :))
then at 10am, Dad entered my room (w/o my permission)
and he woke me up.
i told him
" gal mimpi ngah makan nasi ayam"
Which was true! :D
then he said something about not accompaning mom to market and all, but i was so eager to eat!
LOL :)

then i packed my room, can u believe that? :)
then read some book on 25 nabi and rasul :D
and today was very stupid, cos the washing machine buat hal lagy,
so kena tolong mom laa. we take water and throw water..
wah, ni mcm boleh slim babe! :P
Mom meleteh aje, psl dad tk tawu nk uat ni laa tu laa.

"Gal, turun kasi udang pat Andrie"
"Gal, turun beli glue, dua taw."
"I am so hungry, need buy biscuits"
"Gal turun, beli kicap manis, botol kecik"
banyak songeh.

June 15, 2010 Y 8:30 PM

Sheeshh..! Had a really bad bad toothache today.

Okay, I woke up kinda early today cause i gotta meet Ma'am Angela at 11 for a math intensive tuition.
I had my breakfast at about 10. Then, at about 10.30, i received a phone call from Nyssa..
Asking me to go get her a mac donald's meal as she was unable to get out of the house due to some reasons. heh. So, after getting ready.. I went to get nyssa's food and then, went off to meet Angela.

Met Angela and decided to have the tuition under her block -.-"
UNFORTUNATELY,  i had a sudden toothache! and, it made me feel damn giddy!
I cannot tahan already so, decided to cancel the tuition. Angela was kindaa pissed off with me. im sorry,
The toothache was so DAMN painful that i can't even concentrate on my math.!

I called nyssa to ask her if there's any dental clinic that i can go.
She told me to go the Yishun polyclinic as her sister said that polyclinics do have dentals too.
So, i went home to get my money and im off to the polyclinic.

Registered, but found out that yishun poly does not have any dentist specialist.. hais.
but, i've already registered so, decided to just wait and see the doctor.
Thinking that tmayb, the doctor would be able give me some suggestions on how to ease the pain away? hah.
Sadly, the doctor said that she's unable to help anything with my teeth as she's not a dentist.
However, she gave me pain killers that would help to ease the pain..

Then, i went back home and called nyssa.
Kinda missed her lah! heh.
So, chatted with her on the phone.
i asked if she knows how to cook porridge.. the she said

"You're the one taking FNN course and yet, you're asking me, a DNT student on how to cook porridge?''

I started laughing, Well, kinda true, huh? .
Im the one taking FNN not her. haha!

Now, im just watching tv. nothing else to do.
hais. anw, im GREATFUL that the doctor gave me the pain killers as it really works!
Now, the pain's away. yeaaay!

I guess i'll  end my post here, for today.
I'll update again soon!
takecare, readers.


June 12, 2010 Y 1:51 PM

OKay, what else can i say?
We had a smashing time together going to Marina Bay to buy clothes at Topshop :)
She bought me soemthing from there, aww such a sweet bestfriend I have ! =)
& the other day, i accompanied her and her bf to pastamania!
okay, Yan was so nice cos he belanja me pastamania!
Okay, it was cool, and we had fun.
She gave me all the mushrooms! I LIKE!
Then we went HP hunting for Ayidd.
Afterwards we walked to sembawang shopping centre!
The four of us were singing and having fun!
I was so happy! :)
We went to eat otah2 and we took the bus home after that.
I slept at nyssa's house that night and i waited for her until 2am!
She was chatting and all -.-
see, such a nice friend! =D

Good friend makes you smile though you had a bad day

Y 1:32 PM

Cause I know I can't seem to sleep at night anymore.
I am thinking of Superhuman every night,
I am thinking of LK every night.
Now, I am thinking of Swimming and Gym-ing :)
Superhuman -_-

June 10, 2010 Y 6:17 PM

Okay yesterday was great.
Cos went out with AMira Idayu & Lembu :)
Had girl's Talk and all :D
Okay im out,
just changed blog skin, wahh, so tired alr :P

So happy cos i chatted with cuit2 tdy :D

Okay, i cant make up my mind, so ?

June 8, 2010 Y 5:28 PM

Fall in love with LK, again today :D
and im in the library with my dear Amalina, and old lady, name Angela:P
Okay,so i was so late...
cos i went to Nyssa Bacen house to like hear her out,
Im sleeping over at her place tonighttt !
SO excited,can joke with Kak Fizah and the two babiesss:)

and, the photos to marina is already in FB, and yeah will post later tonight at bestie house ! :D
and now,i am going to dinner !
and ctn with intensive Math with old lady :D

and now,
LK, okay
I am so excited, I just chatted with LK's close friend :D
hahahahha, i was soooo nervous, but exciteedd

okay,later then :D

Cos, when you and I collide,
and one more,
i will shelter you all through the storm 
Sweet ?i know:D

June 7, 2010 Y 5:13 PM

Hello, today its pink, okay lah, but stil i don't like the colour so much.
HAHAH to bestie !:)
and yesterday was awesome!
Cos we went to marina square with 
Nyssa Bacen, Sufyan (Bf of the bacen)
Ayid, Din and me :)
We were having so much fun, i think 

Y 5:10 PM

I am out studying with bestie and Kak Iffah ! :)
So awesome laa ! hahahha
I didn't study yet, hahahah
and i love purple.
So today bestie was late for 21 minutes. :/
and I sent Nyssa Bacen to Yishun, she want meet her bf before he book in again :)
and i slept over at Nyssa Bacen place last night, heheh, was awesome cos I LOVE HER FAMILY :)

and today we went to mac for lunch and we did some studying.
and some re-cap on life :)
I love my bestie alot, you know why?
Cos she makes me laugh without fail and without effort.
I love two of my besties :D
Cos one is Lembu, and one more is Bacen :)
and here's the best thing about today,
LK :)
Yup, my new obsession ;D
And i worry i wont see ur face.
Cos, you and I collide ! ;D

Lovelove <3

June 4, 2010 Y 1:48 PM

So, the worst thing about you is 988
Pang Loong just sang
" Boom, Boom, Boom"

I am in F&N class now,
and Azam,
Only I ROCK, not you!

okay, later then. GOOD DAY

Y 1:43 PM


Okay, that's random :)
Tonight, there is Alexandra, are u looking forward to it? Cos I am ! ;D
And yes, I know that I should be watching Ali Setan instead cos I know, and I think you too
That I LOVE Malay shows, and I can't help but to wonder,
'Which should I watch first ?'
hahah! Okay whatever, I know that I am going to sleep very late tonight,
and I am going to eat alot of FOOD tonight,
Cos I think Mom is bringing food tonight, and I am so excited!

Okay, I really think Alicia Keys Rocks and YES, I HATE NIGHTMARE.

PURPLE makes me smile :D

June 3, 2010 Y 4:49 PM

I cried 5 or 6 times today.
tsk, not cool.

Y 3:39 PM

There's reason why the heart won't let me
Why it won't self-destruct
Maybe it should not wait any longer
You have somebody else to love, somebody there for you to rely on
If you don't you will find another
Since you have 'QWERTY' , you don't need anyone
Cos you know you can turn to 'QWERTY'
and 'QWERTY' is there for you
HOW can i actually let it be ?
Cos I want you happy
and you're very happy
you can spend all the time with 'QWERTY'
Cos we had ours, now its you and 'QWERTY'
Goodbye ****

*jangan nk terasa eh sape2 :D

Y 3:31 PM

Tomorrow will be a very sad day, cos I'm going to lose you dear.

Y 3:11 PM

Okay well, let's see.

HAHAHAHA, now in F&N class.

Can you believe that we have to stay until 5pm for this whole week ?

Anw, let me tell you something.
Something BIG!
I'm in loveeeeee. with this awesome human being, that only Rayhan knows about ;D

OKAY, yesterday, I didnt come school, cos I had a bad fever, cough and flu.
Called Dad in the morning and told him about it, and he said okay :D
So, i managed to sleep for another 2 hours or so, then woke up to eat.
I watched Naga Tasik Chini, a malay show btw, instead of dozing. tsk, regret it now.

anw, went to school ay noon for practical :))
i had my pratical exam ! :D

We started 5 minutes late cos cher had some last minute work to catch up. -,-
can you seriously believe that ?
then we started cooking, running, laughing, and cooking some moreee :)
It was awesome cos at 4.05pm, we started going to each other table, tasting all the dishes.
Rayhan's stove was a mess, but heck, mine was not that clean anw.
My plates were stacking in my sink, untouched and dirty.
I was too lazy,so, I didnt bother washing it.
Cher went to Lydia's Table first, clicking away with her camera.
Make a wild guess how long it took her ?!
More than 10 minutes. :)


We went home at 8pm. After sending Amalina home, I sent Rayhan to her bus stop.
Then I decided to do something very stupid.
I walked home form admiralty. Okay, you know why stupid? Cos it was at night, and it's risky.
but I reached home safely though. :D

Home, and watch TV again, crite..
Victoria Secrets Fashion Show. AWESOME LA :D

ALicia Keys, ROCK? yes :D

June 1, 2010 Y 5:29 PM

OKAY, frankly? it was easy, just that I'm not sure that I can pull through. You want to know why?
COS, when Fina went through the paper with me, I WAS LIKE =.=

Okay, btw, Amalina just said
" I feel like eating sausage." Yeah, we're in F&N Comp lab, doing our Evaluation.

HAHA! Okay, taht was ssssooooo funnnyyyy. :D
And anw, so after that I regretted not studying properly. And i was so dead nervous about my Paper 1, cos I know that teh expositori qn was easierrr..
ARH, shit2! :(

Anw, now i am sick, like really sick.
I'm having fever...
and Im in the comp lab, and its almost the end of class. actually we're supposed to be done at 5pm, but yeahh... -.-

Okay, goodluckkk :D

TMR, im doing the execution..

and im gna cook :D


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Name. Efa Afifah aka Deryana :);
Birthday. 13 Feb 1994;
Where I live: Singapore, and I'm human;
Age: Old enough to be your sister :);
I rule the world and I love music, plus food :)


God♥; Family♥; BestFriends♥; TV& Old classical Malay movies♥; MUSIC♥; Books♥; Running♥; Superhuman♥;


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